Well, hello there! There was no Monday Oops last week, as I was on holiday from my day job and decided to take a break from this newsletter so that I could completely switch off. So here I am, back with my latest musings after what has been another tough week for everybody.
Here in the North East, we’re under strict local lockdown restrictions, so I’m back to being on my own most of the time, aside from my support bubble. The unveiling of these new measures felt like someone had suddenly applied a grey filter to my life, purging my surroundings of the small prism of colour and optimism that had started to glow again in recent months.
Similar to a break up, I feel as though I am still pining over my old pre-COVID life and replaying all the good bits in a never-ending showreel swirling inside my head. I need to accept this new reality and get on with things, but these restrictions have only intensified my low spirits.
Bubble baths, de-cluttering my flat, watching predictable rom-coms, making homemade fruit smoothies, downloading new music, mid-afternoon naps…last week was very subdued, but it gave me a chance to pause and catch my breath. Just getting out of bed, showering and dressing felt like a mini victory at times. Sometimes though, you need to wallow to process everything and begin to look forward.
And that’s the issue, there’s not much to look forward to.
With so much uncertainty, we can’t really plan for the future. I’d normally have concerts, theatre shows, and holidays to look forward to. Right now, I should actually be in Japan with my best friends exploring the sights of Tokyo during what promised to be an epic two-week trip. Instead, it’s Sunday afternoon and I’m still sat in my blue checked pyjamas, my hair scruffily twisted into a top knot, with a dwindling box of chocolate fingers beside me, wondering if it’s acceptable to order a KFC fillet burger and popcorn chicken from Uber Eats.
That’s why, this past week, I decided to put zero pressure on myself to do stuff while I was off work. Instead, I set in motion the things I hope will give me renewed focus in the coming months.
So what wonderful things have I been planning, you may be asking?
#CurbingMySocialMediaAddiction
We all know the score – people only share their edited highlights on social media, yet, we still keep scrolling and double tapping those heart-shaped likes, believing that everybody else’s life is so great.
When I’m flitting between stories and photos of my friends enjoying days out with their partners, babies, dogs and so on – it makes me feel totally rubbish.
That’s not to say I don’t want to see my friends happy and doing lovely things because, of course, I do. I just don’t need a constant reminder that, by stark contrast, I’m sat here in my little household of one.
So, I’ve been curtailing my usage to help me find greater contentment, and stop me from comparing myself to others. I won’t be sharing as much on these apps anymore, either.
#GoodbyeToDating
I don’t see how, with all the different restrictions in place, you can realistically meet someone new in real life or via a dating app. Even if you do somehow manage to navigate the mask wearing, curfews and social distancing, romance just doesn’t seem desirable at the moment.
It’s no secret that I have a love-hate relationship with the Bumbles of this world at the best of times, but I’m officially done with dating for the rest of this year. I would rather devote my time and energy into taking up a new hobby.
Once again, my dating profiles are all blissfully snoozing, and I actually feel relieved. I don’t have to talk about myself, try to think of witty, flirty responses, or muster up interesting questions to ask.
My mantra for the rest of 2020 is most definitely: no guys = no complications.
#ShowingMyHomeSomeLove
During the pandemic, for many people, our homes have become our sanctuaries. And, at last, I feel like I’m beginning to make the Pinterest boards I’ve curated over the past four years into a reality.
Although I only rent my property and can make minimal changes to the décor, I’ve been trying to add personal styling touches to each room. I finally got round to hanging a beautiful landscape painting I bought from The Biscuit Factory art gallery seven months ago, and I’ve been reading up on houseplants (and have a new-found obsession with ficus elastica belize rubber plants). A few leafy additions for my living room, bedroom and kitchen will be arriving this week – I just hope I don’t end up killing them! Says the girl who can’t even keep a succulent…
My spare room has always been a bit of a ‘close the door and don’t go inside’ kinda space and it became my makeshift home office back in March. But the clutter is definitely not the kind of zen I need in there. I’ve been sifting through bags, boxes and drawers to clear out as much as possible. I originally wanted to get rid of my desk and storage units and start afresh, but instead I’ve decided to get creative by giving upcycling a try and have been watching YouTube videos on using chalk paint. My aim is to have the furniture – and room – completed by Christmas.
#OnlineEventsForMyDiary
As I mentioned earlier, planning ahead is a tricky one. But, despite ongoing Zoom fatigue, there are still lots of great finds online, and I’ve signed up for two events in October.
The first is a virtual author event hosted by four independent bookshops, including North East bookseller Forum Books, featuring journalist and podcaster Dolly Alderton, where she’ll be talking about her debut novel, Ghosts. I really enjoyed her first book Everything I Know About Love and can’t wait to read her latest offering, which explores love, memory, ageing and identity.
I’ve also registered for The Single Supplement’s first birthday event – this is a newsletter from journalist Nicola Slawson that I’m signed up to that delves into single life. It’s such a great read each week and I’m looking forward to meeting other subscribers. When making friends IRL isn’t possible, finding online communities is the next best thing.
#FinalThought
A common thread throughout today’s newsletter is how we use our time - something we all have a lot more of these days, while we stay at home and do our bit to stop the virus from spreading.
What we consider a good use of our time is wholly unique to each one of us. Some people might look at my week of naps and house tidying as a waste. For me though, my body and mind needed to rest, so I think my days off were well spent.
Whatever you do today, however insignificant it may seem, remember it’s always an accomplishment of sorts.
If you feel like things aren’t quite going to plan, tomorrow you can start over and begin to plot out new ideas for the coming days, weeks and months ahead – just for you. And for the record, treating yourself to a KFC is definitely okay, too.
September 22 - 28 mixtape
Quote of the week
This week’s quote comes from a book I’ve been reading, The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down:
Do you want to be happy
or do you want to appear happy?
Never mind what the world tells you
to do to be happy
Be truthful to yourself and discover
what you really want.
Documentary of the week
The Social Dilemma is a fascinating watch on Netflix that explores the alarming impact of social networks on society. It features insights from leading tech experts and also a dramatisation of a teenager and his relationship with social media that will make you want to put down your phone immediately afterwards.
Instagram of the week
Whilst trying to curb my daily social media use, I’ve also been seeking out new profiles that will bring a bit of inspo and positivity to my Instagram feed for when I do decide to tap and log on. Scottish solo traveller, Kirsty (aka Pretty Wee Wanderer) shares the most BEAUT-iful photos of locations across Scotland. Love!